thingsneedtobesaid

Not like them..

Posted on: June 9, 2011

Soooo everyone thinks differently about adoption.  I feel like hearing different opinions keeps changing mine.  It’s making it hard for me to find myself when I can’t figure out what’s right and what isn’t.  Everyone has their own truth.  I want to figure out my own.

The good: Family that can care for me, family that can provide for me, unconditional love, amazing opportunities, second chance, amazing family, great life, few worries,etc

The bad: Missing pieces, being different, dirty looks, having to explain my family to everyone, unanswered questions, confusion, mixed opinions, dealing with judgemental people, etc

The ugly: Crying, sudden empty feelings, feeling rejected, hiding the truth so I don’t have to explain myself, etc

For me adoption has mostly been a blessing.  I have an amazing life.  But I do go through those hard times.  I have to think about hard things.  I have to deal with feeling separated from my family.  I will always be jealous of my sister for her blue eyes and brown hair just like my parents.  Recently at a family party my mom pointed out her brother’s kid’s blue eyes.  She walked up to her nephew, my cousin, and said wow you look completely different but I can always recognize those blue eyes those -lastname- eyes.  It was like hard.  I don’t have those eyes…

I don’t have their anything…

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  • vampporcupine: Ahhh...you are so CUTE! I don't know why you look at yourself the way that you do. It may be adoption related or might not. You are adorable :). Remeb
  • Susie: I understand where your feelings are coming from ~ and I know it is so hard to overcome the "not good enough" image you have of yourself. I want to t
  • Susie: The unknown and wondering in adoption is enough to drive you crazy. Not that this probably helps at all, but I was always thinking of my son not only

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